


like a new beginning

by moominliveshere



Category: Teenage Bounty Hunters (TV)
Genre: Cinderella Story AU, F/F, also wanted to get the vibe of the early days of texting, but the angst of it all, but this is the vibe, except they're in college, happy halloween!!!, hence ematch's outdated app, i have not watched a cinderella story in years, i've always thought it's hilarious and amazing that chad michael murray's username was nomad, very loose interpretation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:33:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27281992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moominliveshere/pseuds/moominliveshere
Summary: "Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game."ORthe cinderella story au that no one asked for
Relationships: April Stevens/Sterling Wesley
Comments: 26
Kudos: 127





	like a new beginning

**Author's Note:**

> So this has been my passion project for the last few weeks. It started as a Halloween present for my girlfriend, but I wanted to share with all of you. The title comes from Emily King's song Remind Me. Also, if you, like my gf, have not seen Two Weeks Notice, I highly recommend it!!
> 
> Happy (almost) Halloween! And if you're a US citizen over the age of 18--GO VOTE BIDEN/HARRIS 2020!!!

"Don’t let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game."

-A Cinderella Story

* * *

**Nomad:** Hi! I saw that you’re my best match on this thing and thought I’d say hello [sunshine emoji] [smile emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** Hi! Sorry it’s taken me a few days to respond…start of the semester has been rough >:( So…what’s up with you?

* * *

April cringes as she presses send on her first message to Nomad, her EMatch best match. She’d known about EMatch since her first year of college, but hadn’t wanted to utilize the software until now.

In the early days of coding, before Tinder or Hinge or even Eharmony, a coalition of coders (colloquially known as the Screw Crew) had created a primitive dating software that anyone on campus could sign up for. You anonymously answered a few questions (Class year? Boys or girls? Harry Potter house?) and the software matched you with the one person it deemed your “Best Match.”

In the 21st century, the software has been updated somewhat to be more inclusive (e.g. expanding the gender options, deleting the TERF-book question) and somewhat more technologically advanced (e.g. existing on an app rather than a desktop). But the bones of it, the simplicity of the premise—that you can answer a few questions and be connected with your soulmate--remains the same.

Nearly forty years on, EMatch is a wildly popular tradition with students. It’s also garnered an almost mythical reputation for producing long-lasting relationships. Every year, EMatch advertises with stories of ‘Matchsticks,’ those lucky pairs who found their person, their one and only, through EMatch.

April, jaded as a freshman and still uncomfortably closeted, had initially been disgusted by this advertising. By junior year, though, she’s grown a bit more comfortable in her own skin, coming out to a few friends and generally loosening up. Before school starts, she sees an EMatch ad featuring two women and it tugs on her heartstrings. She’s made out with a few girls at random parties and even enjoyed a brief relationship ( _very_ brief, since the girl in question despised her waking up early on Sunday mornings to go to church…and loved to talk about how much she despised it).

So she’d signed up for EMatch, uncertain but also sure that giving this tradition a shot would be neutral at worst and positive at best. After getting matched, you have a couple of months to message anonymously with your match, getting to know them, feeling out your compatibility. Low pressure.

The day before Halloween, however, the pressure gets turned up exponentially as you and your match separately decide whether to find out each other’s identities. If both members of the pair choose to be identified, then they typically meet in person on Halloween. If both decline, then, April supposes, they go on their merry way.

Then there’s the possibility that makes April’s stomach clench: one person wanting to be identified and the other person…not wanting that. God how embarrassing. Humiliating, even. To open yourself up to someone else and then have them not reciprocate. Well, April’s gone through that before and frankly, it fucking sucked. Still, she reasons as she signs up for the account, it seems unlikely that she will get emotionally invested in some online anonymous rando in the first place.

She comes up with the most generic username she can think of on the spot, only realizing after signing up that it makes her seem like a Golden Girls stan. Could be worse, she thinks. The matches aren’t chosen until a few days later, once the entire student body has had a chance to sign up.

She kind of forgets about the whole thing as school starts and she dives back into her coursework and extracurriculars. Two weeks later…she checks the app after her roommate, Elena, asks her about it, and there it is, her best match. Nomad.

* * *

**Nomad:** oh haha no worries i get it. and nm, working on an english assignment…might go out later, but haven’t decided yet. wbu?

**GoldenGirl04:** Are you an English major?

**GoldenGirl04:** I’m not doing schoolwork or going out tonight, just staying in and watching a film with my roommate and a few friends.

**Nomad:** english/journalism double major. that’s cool, sometimes i forget there’s an in-between option for friday night

**Nomad:** just noticed u called it a ‘film’—anything special?

**GoldenGirl04:** Do you promise not to laugh?

**Nomad:** …cross my heart [yellow heart emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** We’re watching Star Trek.

**Nomad:** hey that’s actually a rlly good movie!!

**Nomad:** would i call it a film [film camera emoji]? maybe not

**GoldenGirl04:** I suppose that’s fair.

**Nomad:** why did u make me promise not to laugh?

**GoldenGirl04:** Some people are rather rude about science fiction, especially women interested in science fiction.

**GoldenGirl04:** Which is absurd considering that the foundational science fiction text was written by a woman.

**Nomad (simultaneously):** wait wasn’t mary shelley like, the original sci-fi author??

**GoldenGirl04:** Oh, um, yes, she was!

**Nomad:** hahaha guess we’re on the same wavelength with this

**Nomad:** well, i actually rlly have to get back to work, this thing is due by 9

**GoldenGirl04:** I understand. Enjoy your evening.

**Nomad:** you too! [yellow heart emoji]

* * *

After that first exchange, April has a minor panic. The thing is, she shouldn’t have enjoyed it as much as she did. Nomad uses text speak to an extent that April would normally find distasteful. Nomad inserts emoji at every turn—often unnecessarily. Nomad’s username is honestly kind of odd; it comes off as more angsty than Nomad appears to be when they’re talking.

The reality is, even though April shouldn’t like talking to Nomad, she does. The more she talks to her, the more she likes her. Nomad is clearly a woman of the world. She knew that Mary Shelley was the mother of science fiction (though as an English major, April supposes that might be par for the course). She’s also curious about pretty much anything April brings up, striking this balance between contributing her own thoughts on a subject and asking for April’s. Their conversations feel revolutionary, as if through the simple act of discussion they’re creating something new.

As for stylistic differences in texting, well, they soon fade into the background. It’s like reading Shakespeare and slowly finding the rhythm of the text—eventually the unfamiliar English is second nature to comprehend. Thus, the text speak feels natural; the emoji accentuate Nomad’s sincerity. Plus, April thinks it’s cute that she ends most of their exchanges with a little yellow heart.

The contrast between Nomad’s username and the overall peppiness she conveys in their messaging is, at this point, more intriguing than off-putting. April wants to know why. About a week into messaging, April realizes that she’s crushing hard on Nomad.

* * *

**GoldenGirl04:** Why did you pick “Nomad” as your username for this endeavor?

**Nomad:** oh um, haha good question

**GoldenGirl04:** Sorry, it’s a personal question. You don’t need to answer. I was just curious.

**Nomad:** no, that’s okay! i’m not totally sure. i guess when i signed up for this, i was feeling like a nomad. like, a wanderer. kind of…untethered

**GoldenGirl04:** Why?

**GoldenGirl04:** Sorry, personal question again. It’s just that, you seem very grounded to me and like someone who’s really good at making and keeping friends.

**Nomad:** oh that’s so sweet! [smile emoji]

**Nomad:** i have some amazing friends and family, i’m sooooooo lucky to have them. but there are some paths we have to walk alone, you know? not to be too cryptic!

April sighs at this. It truly could not be more cryptic.

**GoldenGirl04:** I don’t know your particular circumstances. But I completely understand the feeling of forging a brand new path. I came out to my mom over the summer, actually, and it didn’t go super well, so I’m figuring that out.

**Nomad:** oh im so sorry

**Nomad:** that’s really shitty. do you think she’ll come around?

**GoldenGirl04:** I do, actually. She seems like she’s doing her best. I’m more worried about telling my dad. He’s one of those Christians who thinks the gays should burn in hell. My mom at least takes a “love the sinner hate the sin” attitude.

**Nomad:** well, neither of those r great positions. my grandparents r like that. i haven’t come out to them for that very reason. anyway, i hope ur mom helps u out with ur dad [heart with stars emoji] [four leaf clover emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** Thank you!

**GoldenGirl04:** This is embarrassing! I wasn’t trying to make this conversation about me. I just wanted you to know that you’re not alone.

**GoldenGirl04:** I mean, not to invalidate that your journey is yours alone.

**GoldenGirl04:** Agh, this is coming out wrong.

**GoldenGirl04:** What I really mean is, I’m here for you.

**Nomad:** sry was in class

**Nomad:** I get what you meant. Thank you for saying it, it means a lot. [yellow heart emoji] [sunshine emoji] [sunflower emoji]

* * *

April groans so loudly after asking Nomad about her username that Elena removes her noise-cancelling headphones to check if everything is okay. It is. April’s just embarrassed. Also, more confused than when she started. Nomad is a riddle wrapped in a mystery, shrouded in a motherfucking enigma.

That night, April falls into a fitful sleep. She dreams of her father, only it’s not quite him. His eyes have flames where the irises should be and his voice is all wrong. He’s screaming, April can tell, but she can’t hear him because she’s standing behind a thick wall of glass. She starts yelling back, not out of anger but so that he can hear her. She wakes up gasping for breath.

The next morning, she puts herself on the waitlist for a college-appointed therapist before heading to church. She sees a message from Nomad, which seems to be a link to a Buzzfeed quiz, and smiles, resolving to respond later in the day when she can give it her full attention.

It’s Saturday, but she has volunteered to lead youth group every other Sunday and the youth pastor has asked her and the other volunteer to meet her this morning for an orientation. April has always been involved in church extracurriculars, but for the first time she’s attending an LGBT+ friendly church. She wants to put her best foot forward here, hence signing up to lead Sunday school.

She enters not through the main church doors, but through a partially hidden side door that houses some administrative offices as well as the church-affiliated preschool. She walks purposefully down a long hallway, feet sinking into faded maroon carpet with every step. She knocks on a door at the end of the hall marked “Youth Pastor: Esmeralda Canton.”

Esmeralda opens the door, smiling widely when she sees April. And, okay, it’s possible that April was motivated by multiple factors when she decided to volunteer within the church’s youth services sector. Esmeralda has this thick, curly black hair, usually pulled back into a low ponytail and this open, bright smile. Her eyes are a warm brown--April had finally understood what it meant for eyes to twinkle when she met Esmeralda at a church picnic over the summer. So it’s possible that April has a little crush on Esmeralda. Nothing major—Esmeralda is happily married with two adorable kids, for one. For another, this crush is different from the intensity of her past crushes. This one feels like cotton candy, light and sugary and fun.

April has spent so much of her life trying to tamp down her feelings for other women. Even when she made her peace with God in high school, she’d tried to ignore or dull any passing interest she had in girls (though even she couldn’t resist a kiss from her arch-enemy at the time). Still, just because she was gay didn’t mean she needed to be flamboyant.

She’s slowly freed herself from that self-oppressive mindset such that now she kind of just gets mini-crushes on every kind, beautiful woman that she meets.

Esmeralda pulls her into a hug as they greet each other. She steps into her office happily and then surveys the room, expecting to see her fellow volunteer. Instead, she sees none other than Sterling Wesley.

Fuck.

“April, this is Sterling, your co-leader for Sunday youth group,” Esmeralda exclaims.

At least Sterling looks as shocked as she is.

“Hey! April! Wow, I wasn’t expecting to see you here,” she says.

“Oh,” says Esmeralda, “have you two already met?”

April is starting to feel dizzy and the fact that she’s having trouble forming coherent words is not good to say the least.

Sterling seems to pick up on her discomfort and tries to rescue her, “We went to high school together! But it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, you know, what with college and extracurriculars and like, I’ve been super busy since high school…but I’m so excited to be able to help with this church and my family has been looking for a church like this for a while now so, you know, it feels like a literal godsend and I’m just happy to be here.”

God April had forgotten how twitchy Sterling could be. In this case, the rambling is helpful, allowing her to pull herself together. She can do this. She and Sterling haven’t talked for four years. The Lord is putting them together again for as yet unknown reasons but, April is sure, there _are_ reasons. He works in mysterious ways.

Esmeralda is waving them toward the chairs in front of her desk and asking them to sit down. April sits and suddenly is able to talk again.

“Sterling, what a _wonderful_ surprise,” she manages to say without, to her credit, a hint of animosity. “I hope your family is doing well.”

“They…are,” Sterling says, a tad uncertainly, smiling.

“How lovely! Now, Esmeralda, I’d love to hear more about this position.”

With that, Esmeralda takes the lead, walking them through proposed lesson plans for coming weeks and the scope of their responsibilities. They’re to start next week and will be working with the teen group (“We like to have young adults like yourselves lead the teens so that they can envision a future for themselves that involves the church,” Esmeralda explains).

Nomad doesn’t cross April’s mind until the next night.

* * *

**Nomad:** [link to Buzzfeed quiz: Choose your dream vacation and we’ll tell you which candy you are and why]

**GoldenGirl04:** Hey! Sorry I didn’t get to take this quiz until just now.

**GoldenGirl04:** It looks like I’m Sour Patch Kids, “First you’re sour, then you’re sweet. You can be tough to get to know, and maybe a little unnecessarily sarcastic at times, but those close to you know that you’re an absolute sweetheart”

Nomad responds almost immediately.

**Nomad:** omgggggg I LOVE SOUR PATCH KIDS!!

**Nomad:** well, i hate the taste of them, but just like on a theoretical level !

**Nomad:** haha sorry, im kind of exhilarated rn! but i really do have a special place in my heart for spk + i feel like there’s some accuracy in there…

**Nomad:** at least, you’re definitely an absolute sweetheart [wink emoji]

Wait, is Nomad…flirting with her? April’s cheeks turn red. She’s gonna curve around that one.

**GoldenGirl04:** Wow I was not expecting that reaction! I’ll take it though [wink emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** What did you get?

**Nomad:** Skittles! “Taste the rainbow. People love you even if your enthusiasm can be a lot. You take the good and the bad in life and make it into something spectacular. Also you’re super gay.”

**GoldenGirl04:** I love that for you! We haven’t even met but it fits. Although I’ve never thought you were overly enthusiastic.

**Nomad:** that’s kind of u

**GoldenGirl04:** Did it really say the thing about you being gay??

**Nomad:** haha u caught me, i added that [rainbow emoji] [smirking purple devil emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** Nomad, you’re so bad :o

**Nomad:** cant believe i inspired an emoticon! next thing u know you’ll be using emojis

**GoldenGirl04:** If anyone could get me to do that, it’d be you.

**GoldenGirl04:** Goodnight!

**Nomad:** sweet dreams [yellow heart emoji]

* * *

That week is a flurry of activity. April is studying for her first round of midterms, prepping for a debate tournament happening in a few weeks, and organizing an upcoming event for the Queer Student Union (queer trivia night at the student pub). And of course, she’s also thinking about her first lesson for Sunday school later in the week.

To that end, she and Sterling meet at a local coffeeshop, the Thinking Bean, one of April’s go-to spots for getting work done. April arrives half an hour early so that she can get a seat facing the door and generally be on her guard. She doesn’t want a repeat of last Saturday when she was embarrassingly incoherent.

She orders a latte and takes her seat, smiling absent-mindedly at the barista. A few minutes later, she’s sitting down, breathing in the scent of coffee and attempting to practice mindfulness. The door to the coffeeshop squeaks open and Sterling Wesley walks in, fifteen minutes ahead of their scheduled meeting time. Looks like April wasn’t the only one who wanted a little extra time for mental preparation.

Sterling doesn’t see April when she walks in and moves quickly to the ordering line. No one is behind her, and April watches her engage in a long, _friendly_ chat with the barista. It seems like Sterling is a regular here--April’s interest is piqued.

Once Sterling gets her drink, she spots April, who waves her over awkwardly. Sterling plops down, looking pleased to see her. Or, probably just pleased in general, and nothing to do with her. They greet each other quietly. April wants to get down to business, but she truly can’t stop herself from engaging in a bit of small talk.

“So, I’ve never seen you here before…”

“Oh yeah, I’ve actually only be here one other time, so that’s probably why,” Sterling laughs lightly.

“Oh, I just thought. You seem friendly with the barista, so I figured you’d met her here,” April says, forcing herself to sound casual.

“Oh, Steffie? She was my roommate freshman year! I haven’t seen her in ages though and I had no idea she worked here, so we were just catching up,” Sterling says easily.

“Got it. That makes sense. Well, anyway, I suppose we should get started planning for this Sunday,” April says, changing the subject.

“Yep, Sterling chirps, “so it looks like Esmeralda wants us to discuss the Book of Job,” she continues, pulling out her laptop.

April pulls her laptop out as well, and they get to work.

The experience of working with Sterling Wesley again is…different. The last time they had worked together, April had been hyper-focused. She had recently seen video footage of her dad hitting a hooker in a seamy motel corridor and was doing her best to block that shit out. She remembers Sterling’s dad’s woodshop and the cute little wooden ducks lining the windowsills. She remembers a feeling of intense concentration as she operated the miter saw, cutting the wood for Solomon’s temple.

Later, Sterling had whispered to her about how distracted she had been that day, how she had been mesmerized by April’s form, intoxicated by her smooth, confident movements. Safely ensconced in the back seat of the Wesley twins’ Chevy Volt, April had blushed and smiled widely and exercised a new skill, flirting, by telling Sterling that woodcarving wasn’t the only thing she felt confident about.

Today, sitting in her favorite coffeeshop next to a girl she had once loved, with whom she had once shared her most intimate secrets, April is unfocused. She’s able to respond about the lesson plan at appropriate moments, but it’s all surface level. It’s like Sterling is in high definition and everything around her looks a little blurry, a little dull. Her eyes track Sterling’s movements—shoulders rolling back, neck stretching, long fingers typing notes on the computer. Sterling pushes a loose strand of hair behind her ear and April’s eyes widen upon seeing the side of her wrist—

“Is that a tattoo?” she asks, incredulous.

Sterling smiles self-consciously, bringing her left hand to touch her wrist. “Um, yeah, yeah, it is.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, and you know, I always thought I’d never get one, but then one day Blair suggested we get matching ones and I just decided it was, you know, a nice idea.”

Sterling is clearly nervous, overexplaining and grinning this sheepish grin, like she got caught with her hand in a cookie jar.

“Oh, you don’t have to explain,” April finds herself saying.

“No,” Sterling says immediately, “No, I wanted to. I mean, our parents almost killed us when they saw it. My mom asked if we wanted to look like criminals.”

Sterling laughs at this, so April does, too.

“But she’s come around,” Sterling continues.

“That’s nice. You and Blair were always so close. It makes sense…”

April trails off, feeling a bit out of her depth at this point. Also, the mention of Sterling’s parents has reminded her of why she and Sterling stopped talking in the first place. It’s dangerous territory.

Sterling seems to sense the danger as well and shifts them back toward the lesson—they’re going to center the class around a single theme: “Why do the righteous suffer?”

Unbidden, April’s thoughts wander to Nomad. What would she think about Job? Would she have strong opinions about divine justice? What was she doing right now?

* * *

**GoldenGirl04:** Nomad, do you believe in God?

**Nomad:** that’s a big question for 2am

**GoldenGirl04:** I know! I was just wondering. I’ve talked about my faith before, but I don’t know much about yours.

**Nomad:** I believe in God. Idk if I mentioned it but I go to church every Sunday. I used to think that’s where God was. But…my experiences have taught me that God is love. It sounds cheesy but I think He’s everywhere that love is. I still go to church, but it’s really more because I enjoy the ritual of it, of being with my family and singing and praying with a bunch of other people.

**GoldenGirl04:** I get that. That’s a beautiful perspective.

**Nomad:** Mhmm. Coming out was actually really critical to me realizing that

**GoldenGirl04:** How so?

**Nomad:** It was like, when I told the people I loved most that I was bi, like my parents and my sister and my ex, they all looked kind of confused and even upset, but they also still had this look in their eyes that I could tell was how much they loved me. And I kind of pieced together that was where God was, in that look.

**Nomad:** I was lucky, too, because I knew someone else my age who was queer and she had some issues with like, society, but she knew she was right with God.

**Nomad:** Ahhh I’m rambling + using correct punctuation to discuss the Lord at 2am!! You really have me fired up over here GG lol

**GoldenGirl04:** Well I suppose 2am isn’t the ideal time to discuss our complicated relationships with God, but I appreciate you being so open with me. And I’m glad the people you came out to had that love for you. <3

**Nomad:** ofc im glad u asked. i think it’s important to articulate that kind of thing, too! <3 ;)

**GoldenGirl04:** I have an unrelated question for you.

**Nomad:** shoot pardner [water gun emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** Do you have any plans for this weekend?

**Nomad:** hahahah mmm not rlly. saturday is toga night at the frats [greek urn emoji] might hit that up but I hate ruining my sheets like that [bed emoji] [beer emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** Yes, I personally think of toga night as a freshman year experience.

**Nomad:** fair fair. what r ur plans?

**GoldenGirl04:** I’ll be at queer trivia night, hosted by the QSU. You should come! It’s open to everyone. There’s a $5 cover raising funds for the Trevor Project.

**Nomad:** oh that sounds super fun!! im woefully ignorant of my queer history tho

**GoldenGirl04:** That’s okay! There are some non-queer categories. There’s also queer pop culture, which I think you’d excel at.

**Nomad:** hmm alright ur selling me on it! [dollar bill emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** Fantastic! Of course, I won’t know who you are. But it’s nice to know you might be playing along.

**Nomad:** [yellow heart emoji] [yellow heart emoji] [yellow heart emoji]

* * *

Queer Trivia Night is kind of a mess. April has organized the event, reserving space in the student union, purchasing hors d’oeuvres and apps with QSU funds, purchasing two kegs and some liquor with “alternative” funds, decorating the space, and getting a friend to emcee…which is what leads to the mess.

It’s always the human factor, April thinks, sighing internally. Her friend and supposed emcee, Darius, is currently vomiting his guts out due to some bad sushi at lunch. He obviously feels terrible about it, so April tries to contain her distress until she hangs up the phone.

“What am I supposed to do?” she asks Elena, looking around the pristine space forlornly.

“Ummm,” Elena’s mouth is full from shoving two pigs in a blankets in there. She swallows as April looks up at her with a glint in her eye.

“Oh no,” Elena says.

“What?”

“I know what you’re going to say next and it’s not happening.”

“Why not? You’d be an amazing emcee. Perfect, even. Your voice is, you know, soothing. And you’re funny.”

“Absolutely not! Stage fright runs in my family. I will projectile vomit these hors d’oeuvres on stage. Have you seen Pitch Perfect?”

April nods, realizing she is losing this battle.

“Yeah, it’ll be like that girl in Pitch Perfect whose a capella career was basically ruined due to nervous projectile vomiting on the audience.”

“Didn’t they win a title in the end?” April rather weakly gives one last try.

“Doesn’t matter,” Elena says, “I’m not doing it. Besides, you need me at the door doing tickets and covers and that kind of thing. Why don’t you just do it?”

“Well, I organized the event. I was supposed to introduce Darius and then, I don’t know, worry about all the other aspects of this evening running smoothly?”

“This isn’t The Wedding Planner, April. You’re not J-Lo wearing a Bluetooth headset and ensuring someone’s special day runs smoothly. Everything will be fine. Anyway, if you’re on stage you’ll be able to see if something goes wrong.”

“Jesus, what is with the movie references today?”

“Oh wow, you really are freaking out. Taking the Lord’s name in vain and everything,” Elena snickers a bit. She has not been saved.

April rolls her eyes. “It was not in vain! It was a legitimate question,” she loses some steam, “Fine, I will be the fucking emcee! You,” she gestures at Elena, “get to the front of the house, this shindig is about to start. I’m calling Darius. He better be able to send me his fucking notes…”

Elena wanders over to the front door as April makes her way backstage. She’s feeling a bit better with the release of a few well-placed cuss words. She mentally apologizes to Jesus for using his name in anger, then takes a deep breath. She can do this.

***Two Hours Later***

April breathes a sigh of relief. The event is actually going really well. Lots of people are here, many of them upperclassmen not interested in Toga Night activities. And, they all look like they’re enjoying themselves. Most have a beer or mixed drink in hand. Some heads are bobbing in time to the music.

Round 9: _Any Fantasy Novel Except Harry Potter_ is a big hit so far. With each question, April adds a snarky remark about TERFs (she has to give Darius some credit here—he’s a pun master).

She reads off the seventh question, a two-part fill in the blank: “In The Lightning Thief, written by [blank], Percy’s dyslexia is actually a result of [blank]? Hint: The author is not a TERF.” Not some of Darius’ best work, she thinks. But it gets the job done.

The audience giggles a bit, clearly engaged, and as April’s head turns, she spots a familiar blonde head in the audience. Sterling. April clears her throat, and the mic chooses that moment to let out a piercing shriek. Of course.

Elena, now playing trivia with some of their mutual friends, hurries over to turn the speakers down. Sterling, who was previously chatting with some friends, is now looking at her. April can feel a red flush spread up her neck to her cheeks.

She clears her throat self-consciously, then starts reading the next question. There’s only one round after this and then they’re opening up the floor for dancing/general partying. She can get through it.

She does get through it and the winners, Queer Quiz Night Queenz, approach her for their prize, which is a round of shots on the house plus one of April’s old field hockey trophies. Sterling is, thankfully, not part of the winning group.

She pours shots of tequila for the winners and herself (she figures she deserves it after the last-minute emceeing). She raises her shot glass and accidentally makes direct eye contact with one of the Queenz, Lotus.

It turns into a bit of a stare-down. “Salud,” says April, ostensibly to the group. But she hasn’t broken eye contact with Lotus. They toss back their drinks. The alcohol burns April’s throat and she deeply regrets not having a chaser on hand.

As if reading her mind, Lotus starts speaking, “Hey, let me get you a beer to chase that down. And maybe another shot if you’re up for it?” She quirks an eyebrow.

April licks her lips, suddenly nervous. Lotus’ teammates have scattered—clearly, they’re good wing-people.

“I—yeah—I mean, that sounds. Good,” April stutters, finishing lamely.

“Cool. Wait for me here? Someone needs to protect the good stuff.” Lotus gestures at the tequila with a slight grin.

April gives a breathless laugh. “Yeah, cool. I’ll be here.”

As Lotus heads for the keg, April slumps down, breathing a sigh of relief. What is going on with her? She’s known Lotus for a few semesters, but has never hung out with her one-on-one. But now it seems like Lotus is…flirting with her?

Her tequila-addled mind (okay, it was one shot, but April’s a light weight and she can genuinely feel it coursing through her body) is attempting to process this new information about Lotus when none other than Sterling Wesley walks up to her.

“Hey! April!” Sterling is cheerful as ever.

“Hey, Sterling, great to see you here!” April tries for friendly, but lands on stilted.

“Yeah, well, I’d never pass up an opportunity to support my fellow queers!”

“I’ve literally never seen you at a QSU event before.” April cringes internally, knowing that came out a little harsh. It’s true, though.

“Oh, that’s true,” Sterling seems stumped. “I just, thought I’d give it a shot. Before, I kind of felt like maybe I wasn’t gay enough for QSU.” She shakes her head.

“And like, Toga Night at this point is so passe. Like, whatttt?” She wiggles her shoulders in an awkward shimmy to emphasize her point.

April has a flash of insight—she’s not the only slightly tipsy person in this conversation. The realization helps her gain back some confidence.

“I applaud your attempt to diversify your free-time activities,” she starts formally. “And, just so it’s clear, you’re gay enough for QSU. I should know. I mean,” April blushes. She _really_ didn’t mean to bring up their previous romantic entanglement.

Sterling’s mouth is hanging open. The look is unflattering, but April finds herself thinking that it’s endearing. Very Sterling.

“What I mean is. We welcome anyone who doesn’t fit into the heteronormative box we’re all put in at birth. That includes you.”

Sterling is smirking now and April’s feeling of endearment gives way to irritation. Embarrassment, really, but it’s manifesting as irritation. Why should Sterling smirk at her?

April’s deciding between storming off in a huff and telling Sterling off when Lotus reappears holding two solo cups filled with beer.

“Hey,” Lotus looks uncertain for the first time that evening. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Oh no, no,” Sterling says, just as April’s says, “Absolutely not.”

“I was just heading out, actually. Good night, April.”

April barely acknowledges her. Lotus holds out one of the solo cups. April takes it and they clink cups.

“Cheers,” Lotus says. And the eye contact is back. Suddenly, April notices that Lotus’ hand is resting on her forearm. It’s hot. April’s mouth is dry and she guzzles the beer like it’s going to hydrate her.

“So listen,” Lotus says.

“Uh-huh,” replies April, barely coherent.

“I have to leave soon cuz it’s one of my friends’ birthdays and we’re bar hopping tonight.”

April nods. Lotus’ thumb is rubbing circles on April’s arm. It seems unconscious but God. She can’t concentrate.

“But, I was hoping I could get your number. And maybe we could find a time to get drinks or something sometime soon.”

Lotus hands April her phone as she speaks and April, finally starting to get the drift of this conversation, takes it eagerly.

“Totally.” She enters her contact info into Lotus’ phone. “Text me,” she says.

Lotus smiles at her, a slow, sincere smile. Even after the shot and the beer, April can tell it’s sincere. Slowly but smoothly, Lotus leans forward and brushes the shadow of a kiss against April’s mouth before sauntering away.

April’s stunned. She’s burning up. She takes another shot of tequila and, turning around, sees that Elena has witnessed this entire situation from across the room. She practically runs to her, arms flapping, close to screaming.

“You saw that, right?”

“Oh I saw that!!”

“I feel like I’m in a rom-com??”

“What a meet-cute! I’ve never seen Lotus on somebody like that. She must like you.”

“Yeah…”

April is out until 3am. Mostly just dancing her heart out with Elena and other QSU friends. It’s one of those nights that April had never imagined would be possible for her, back when she was stuck in a homophobic household. Her heart feels so full.

Elena is off with her newest paramour when April heads back to their room, so she has some quiet moments to herself before bed. She’s quite drunk, and so forcing herself to drink a bottle of water before bed. She’s never thrown up from alcohol before and she’s not planning to start now.

As she undresses and puts on her PJs, she spares a thought for Nomad. She’s been caught up in the flurry of feelings that Lotus has stirred up (mostly feelings of desire and that intoxicated feeling of being _wanted_ ).

But she catches herself, in this moment of drunken solitude, feeling a bit guilty. She doesn’t owe Nomad anything, but she cares about her. She feels a bond with her that goes deep. She doesn’t know what Nomad looks or sounds like, but she knows that she has a beautiful heart.

What’s Nomad doing right now, she wonders. It’s a thought she’s had many times since they’ve started talking. She suddenly longs for Nomad to be a flesh and blood person. Lotus seems great, but they don’t know each other yet. Things feel…unbalanced.

She’s about to go to sleep when her phone pings.

“hey its lotus [smiley emoji] [yellow heart emoji]”

Her drunken mind feels confused for a split second. Terrible grammar followed by the yellow heart emoji. She recognizes that pattern of texting. Could it be? Is Lotus…Nomad?

* * *

April wakes up late the next morning and dresses for the gym. She loves getting a workout in after a night of copious alcohol consumption. She starts off on the treadmill, pounding out a mile and a half before heading to the weights.

It feels good to let off some steam, and moving her body forces her to focus on the present, rather than the nagging question of who Nomad is. She’s less sure now than she had been last night. Nomad had known about trivia night, but it seems impossible that Nomad could know that _April_ is GoldenGirl04. The only way to know for sure is to go out with Lotus.

She texts Lotus after her workout and they arrange a time later in the week to go out. Lotus suggests dinner at one of April’s favorite sushi places (April later searches her conversation with Nomad to see if she had ever mentioned sushi, but no dice). And there’s a cute theater nearby that always has one screen dedicated to an older film, in this case Desert Hearts. A perfect date.

April’s stomach churns as Lotus signs off their final text with a flower emoji, yellow heart emoji, and orange heart emoji. She debates with herself for the rest of the day, first convincing herself not to message Nomad until after her date with Lotus, then convincing herself of the opposite. After dinner that evening, the decision is made for her: Nomad has messaged her.

* * *

**Nomad:** so how was queer trivia night? win any prizes? [magnifying glass emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** It went well! And no, I did not. Did you end up going? I was thinking about you while I was there. Wondering if you were there, too.

**Nomad:** oh that’s so sweet! i was wondering the same thing. which means, yes, i was there. not the whole time, but for a good chunk. maybe we saw each other and didn’t even realize [wink emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** That’s a romantic thought.

**Nomad:** hmm i’d argue that it’s romantic that u think it’s romantic

**GoldenGirl04:** Hmm, not sure I’m the girl you want to debate with. I’ve won debate championships before I’ll have you know.

**Nomad:** very impressive! i have almost won debate championships before, which should count for something

**GoldenGirl04:** We’re well-matched.

**Nomad:** clearly

**Nomad:** I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something…

**GoldenGirl04:** What about? Is it serious? Are you okay?

**Nomad:** no no it’s nothing bad

**Nomad:** sorry didn’t want to freak you out.

**GoldenGirl04:** Just tell me.

**Nomad:** i know it’s a little premature, but i was wondering if u had thought about whether u wanted us to meet in person on Halloween or not

April has no idea what to say to this. She freezes, thumbs hovering over her phone keyboard.

**Nomad:** i don’t want to pressure you or anything. but i want you to know that i would like to find out who u r

**Nomad:** i like u a lot. talking to u is usually the best part of my day. and yeah, idk i’m going through some confusing times rn and ur like this awesome, not confusing person. except for the part where idk who u r

**Nomad:** so when the day comes, i would love to meet you. and i hope u do too.

**GoldenGirl04:** To be honest, I hadn’t thought about it. But I love talking to you, too. I feel so grounded when I’m talking to you, which is odd because, like you said, I don’t know who you are. So yeah, I would like to meet you on Halloween, too.

**Nomad:** cool! [yellow heart emoji]

**Nomad:** also omfg u took so long to respond!! i almost had a heart attack

**GoldenGirl04:** Sorry, sorry! I got caught off-guard. Glad you didn’t have a heart attack.

**Nomad:** samez

**Nomad:** gn [snoring emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** Goodnight

* * *

It’s date night. April dons a pair of black skinny jeans, black boots, and a yellow top. She pulls her hair back into a tight, high ponytail. She wants to project confidence tonight.

Lotus is waiting for her downstairs and greets her with a warm hug. April breathes into the hug, smells the coconut of her shampoo. Lotus looks hot as fuck, there’s no way for April to deny it. She’s wearing a silky, dark green jumpsuit. The pendant of a gold necklace nestles against her chest, framed perfectly by the v-neck of the fabric. Her hair is falling in dark waves against her shoulders.

April hops into the passenger seat of Lotus’ car and starts to talk. Luckily for her, Lotus is a good conversationalist and there aren’t any awkward pauses. They mostly chat about trivia night and the Quiz Night Queenz’s celebration after.

At the restaurant, they start to dig into juicier topics. Some of which give April pause.

“So, I want to be transparent with you,” Lotus says.

“Okay,” April replies, feeling nervous. What if this is about Nomad?

“Well, I just got out of a relationship.”

“Okay…is this…I mean, do you want to talk about it?” April tries to sound normal but she’s a tad weirded out by the direction of this conversation.

“Well, it happened yesterday, so it’s pretty fresh. But it’s 100% the right decision and I didn’t want to cancel on you. I think you’re really cool,” Lotus says sincerely.

Despite the sincerity, April is now officially weirded out.

“Oh but, you asked me out over the weekend? Weren’t you still in a relationship at that point?”

“Oh no, no!” Lotus is quick to answer. “I mean, I was, but we were in an open relationship. Things weren’t great at that point, with my partner. He was kind of acting out in a really juvenile way about some things. But it was all above board, nothing to worry about on that front.”

April smiles and says something appropriate, but on the inside, she’s still kind of reeling from this information. It really shouldn’t be a huge deal. People are entitled to ask other people out and not tell them they’re in an open relationship. Lotus is actually being really cool about sharing, though the details about the break up aren’t great. But April isn’t into polyamory. She’s not judging, but it’s just not her scene.

Her heart sinks. What if Lotus is Nomad and Nomad/Lotus wants to be in an open relationship with her? Could she do it? So far, Lotus objectively seems nice, but she feels different from the way she feels when she’s texting Nomad.

It’s stupid, really, it’s so minor. So she doesn’t want to bare her soul to a girl on their first date. It’s not a big deal. But the silly, romantic part of her thought that it would click.

They get to the movie theater. April’s chilled out a bit. It’s a gorgeous night and she’s out with a gorgeous girl. It doesn’t matter if they’re not soulmates.

April offers to get them snacks for the movie, since Lotus paid for dinner.

“Any particular candy and/or drink that you like? Don’t worry about popcorn, I’m definitely ordering that.”

Lotus looks pleased that April’s offering.

“Can I get a Sprite please? And maybe some Sour Patch Kids, if it’s not too much?”

April nods. “Not too much at all! Sprite and Sour Patch Kids coming right up!”

Lotus heads to the restroom while April gets in the concession stand line. She places her order and it’s only once the guy at the counter is bending over to grab their candies that she realizes—Nomad hates Sour Patch Kids. It’s come up multiple times. She's talked about liking them in theory but that they always disappoint in practice. It’s like a personality trait with her, or like it goes deeper than just disliking the sour bits cutting up her mouth. There’s no effing way Nomad would casually order Sour Patch Kids at the movies.

Lotus taps on April’s shoulder, bringing her out of her realization. She smiles weakly.

“Hey.”

“Hey!” Lotus says. “Thanks for getting all of this. It’s super sweet of you.”

“Of course, of course. It’s nothing.”

They head into the theater. April settles in, enjoying the opening sequence of Desert Hearts. In the darkness, Lotus reaches for her hand and she lets her take it. Lotus’ hand is warm and maybe a little clammy, but not unpleasantly so. There’s no spark, though. April has gone on dates before and there’s always a spark during the successful ones. Always something electric about the moment when skin touches skin.

Still, it’s nice to be sitting in a theater holding hands with a girl who seems like she might be a good friend. A friend who is most definitely not Nomad.

The movie ends. April and Lotus walk outside toward the parking lot. It’s 9:30 and the sun set hours ago.

“So,” Lotus says as they climb into her car, and she seems nervous all of a sudden. “Would you want to head back to my place or?”

“Oh,” says April, taken aback, though of course this is standard date stuff. “Um, I actually have an early morning so I should probably head back to my room.” Lotus nods in understanding, looking a little hurt, but taking it like a champ. “Thank you for tonight though, I had a really great time.” April means it.

They hug goodbye outside April’s building.

Elena looks up when she enters the room. “I wasn’t expecting you back so early.”

“Yeah, well, I have to get up early to plan for Sunday school,” she says. It’s the truth, but not the whole truth.

“Mhmm,” Elena says skeptically.

“And…I don’t think Lotus is the one for me. She’s super nice though!” April’s keeping it upbeat, though based on her pursed lips, Elena can definitely tell there’s more to the situation than is meeting the eye. 

“Well, I’m glad you put yourself out there, even if it didn’t work out.”

“Me, too.”

* * *

**GoldenGirl04:** What’re you up to tonight?

**Nomad:** mmm not much, watching a movie. i have to be up early tomorrow

**GoldenGirl04:** Me too! That’s typical for me, anyway. I pictured you as the sleeping in type. What movie?

**Nomad:** haha im going to take that as a compliment

**Nomad:** i havent been sleeping super well tbh, so getting up early will be a good thing

**Nomad:** two weeks notice! it’s a comfort movie for me. i [heart with stars emoji] sandy bullock.

**Nomad:** and hugh grant w his puppy dog eyes [dog emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** I love that movie! LOVE Sandra. Hugh’s alright. Where are you in it? Maybe I’ll watch along…

**Nomad:** just started! i can rewind if u want to watch together?

**GoldenGirl04:** That sounds perfect! I’m pulling it up on Netflix as we speak.

**GoldenGirl04:** It’s loading…so what’s your favorite part of this cinematic marvel?

**Nomad:** lol hmmmm

**Nomad:** probably when they’re at the charity ball/costume party? and hugh grant is wearing the giant tie + sandy bullock is wearing that amazing cocktail dress

**Nomad:** and hugh gives her the red clown nose

**Nomad:** absolutely love the tension of it all + the heartbreak when she finds him + that woman playing strip poker or we [heartbreak emoji]

**GoldenGirl04:** God this movie is so good!! You can press play btw!

**Nomad:** ooh yay!! pressing now. i didn’t peg u as a romcom lover…whats ur fave part??

**GoldenGirl04:** Oh, good question.

**GoldenGirl04:** Probably the ending, when Sandra runs after Hugh and the build up was all worth it and their chemistry is just _there_ because they really know the best and worst of each other, you know?

**GoldenGirl04:** I’m a sucker for a happy ending.

* * *

The next morning, she’s up at 6. She and Sterling are meeting at the Thinking Bean at 7, which gives her about half an hour to get ready, twenty minutes to get to the coffee shop, and ten minutes to begin the caffeination process before focusing on Sunday school.

They had originally wanted to meet at a reasonable hour during the week, but Sterling had cancelled. Twice. April’s annoyed by the rescheduling, but she’s a big enough person to be a little concerned, too. She hasn’t been friends with Sterling for years, but it’s not like her to be flaky.

When Sterling walks into the Thinking Bean, April’s worries are realized. Sterling looks awful. She’d seemed well on Saturday, but now she seems like a mess. April waves her over after the other girl orders. She looks from Sterling to the chair in front of her. Sterling gets the hint and sits down with a sigh.

“Sterling, what is going on with you?” April doesn’t mean to sound accusatory but that’s how it comes out. Almost venomous.

“Nothing, _April_.” She emphasizes April’s name, surly. It’s been a while since April has dealt with a surly Sterling Wesley.

“That came out wrong.” April tries to course correct. “I just—I saw you on Saturday and you were fine. And now you’re here a week later and you cancelled on me _twice_ and you look like you haven’t slept in days.”

“It’s not really any of your business.”

“It _is_ my business if you’re not showing up for Sunday school planning.” April’s more hurt by Sterling’s words than she’d care to admit. Unfortunately, Sterling is attuned to the way April expresses her hurt and the uppity tone, which might put others off, actually softens Sterling.

“Okay. I didn’t think you’d want to know.” She’s stilted, as if it’s painful for her to say the words. “My… _aunt_ …was paroled on Sunday.”

Oh shit.

“Oh my God, Sterling.” April’s horrified. “I thought she’d gotten 15 years? How could she be out already?”

“She snitched on a bunch of top dogs over in the trailer park to help reduce her sentence. That plus good behavior. I mean, she has to report to her parole officer every evening at this point but. I just don’t feel safe right now.” Sterling rubs her temples.

“Sterl, I’m so sorry. You must be flashing back to that night.”

“I am…I have been this whole week. I’ve been scared to leave my room. Blair’s been staying with me every night. God!”

“Okay, well first of all, thank you for coming today. If I’d known…” April shakes her head. “I would’ve been a lot more chill about the rescheduling.”

Sterling waves her hand. “It’s okay, how would you know?”

“Second of all,” April rushes to say, “You are safe, Sterling. Dana can’t hurt you and even if she somehow did…well, you already know you can survive that situation and go on to thrive. You’re strong and smart and brave…”

April trails off and can feel herself turning bright red. Sterling probably thinks she’s an idiot. But no, Sterling’s actually smiling at her.

“Thanks, April. You always had a way with words.” She laughs quietly. “And I needed to hear that, especially from someone who knew me back then.” She stands slowly. “I’m gonna grab my coffee and then let’s do this?”

April just nods. Sterling comes back and they set their laptops up, ready to bang out this lesson plan.

“So, the Book of Ruth, huh?”

“Yeah…you know I’ve actually heard that Naomi and Ruth were like… _together_ ,” April says dramatically, waggling her eyebrows and grinning at Sterling.

“You know what? I think I’ve heard that, too,” Sterling says, grinning right back at her.

* * *

Sunday school goes smoothly. Esmeralda observes, sitting in the back of the youth group classroom. Before class, Esmeralda had assured them that her observations were purely so that she could provide them with constructive feedback on their lessons, with no ulterior motive. Still, April is nervous.

Sterling starts them off with a discussion of vocab and historical context—there’s a bunch of stuff about redemption and familial relationships that can get confusing for the modern reader. April admires her almost unthinkingly, appreciating the sound of her voice and the confident way she turns to write on the whiteboard.

“April. April!”

April clears her throat, suddenly realizing that it’s her turn.

“Okay,” she says, “we’re going to count off into two groups now and each group will discuss one discussion question. Lawrence, you start.”

Once the kids have counted off, she turns to write the discussion questions on the board, narrating as she writes.

“Question one: Why does Ruth stay with Naomi? Question two: Why does God reward Naomi and lift her out of poverty?”

When she’s finished writing, she turns back to the class. “These are open-ended questions, meaning there’s more than one way to think about them and pretty much no 100% correct answer. Try not to look at your phones for this—there are answers online, but I’d rather hear what’s going on in your brain.”

The kids look at her blankly.

“Okay, go forth. Take twenty minutes to answer these questions and then we’ll come back for the last ten minutes to discuss as a group.”

A few hands go up. Sterling speaks up, clearly trying not to roll her eyes. “And yes, you may sit outside if that’ll help you think better.” The hands go down. Everyone scatters and Esmeralda walks to the front of the room.

“Wonderful job, you two, just wonderful!” She’s as enthusiastic as ever.

April and Sterling smile.

Sterling is the first to respond. “Aww, thank you! This was a really fun one to plan.”

“Yes! The themes of kindness and the strength of familial, if not biological, bonds are really key. We wanted to make sure that that came through,” adds April.

“Oh, they did,” Esmeralda bobs her head. “You two really have great chemistry up there, too. That’s been missing in the past and I think it makes a real difference to have people who clearly like each other leading. The tweens and teens can smell if the energy is off!”

April is blushing and she’s gratified to see that Sterling is as well. Chemistry?? What vibes are they putting out there? Sterling is about to speak, but April cuts her off, quite sure that whatever Sterling says will be a stammering, nonsensical jumble of words.

“Well that’s what comes from knowing each other for so long. Such a blessing in this context!” She smiles as widely as she can, knowing that she sounds fake but unable to stop herself.

“Mhmm,” Sterling jumps in. “Blessed, bless—it’s a blessing, mhmm, for sure.”

Esmeralda looks between them, bemused. “I’m going to head out now. Great work! I bet you ladies could chatter up front all day, but I suggest checking in with each group to make sure you’re on the same page with the discussion.”

They nod wordlessly and start walking in opposite directions, careening into each other like idiots. They sort themselves out and the next ten minutes pass smoothly.

When they get back together as a whole group, April asks the first group about their thoughts on the question of why Ruth stayed with Naomi.

The unspoken group leader, Farrah, raises her hand.

“Go ahead, Farrah.”

“Well, one of the things we thought is that, maybe Ruth is a lesbian.” She smirks as she says it, clearly looking to get a rise out of them. Next to her, Sterling seems to be choking on air.

April, level-headed queen that she is, doesn’t bat an eyelash. These kids will not fuck with her.

“Does anyone else in the group want to add onto that?”

A different girl responds. “Well, like, Ruth is basically like, I cleave unto you, which sounds gay and then she’s like, I will live out all my days with you and like die with you. Like, the drama of it and like, it’s two women, so.”

Another girl chimes in, “Ruth gives up so much for Naomi. I don’t think I’d do that for someone who’s just a friend.”

April blinks rapidly at these tangled responses. She looks at her watch, takes a breath, and then responds.

“We’re going to take just a couple more minutes to discuss this because I want to have time for group two to respond. But here’s my take: Ruth is loyal. She’s full of the “milk of human kindness” as Shakespeare would say. She could be gay. Naomi could also be gay. There’s nothing wrong with imagining that because the text really doesn’t give us much to go on regarding her sexual orientation. The point is, Ruth loves Naomi. We don’t know if it’s romantic or platonic love, but we know it’s love. That’s why she stays and that’s why she’s rewarded in the end. Because _God is love and He’s everywhere that love is_.”

April looks to Sterling, who seems impressed and also, is tearing up? April doesn’t have time to figure it out. The class is kind of stunned into silence. They clearly were not expecting a sincere response to their query. April clears her throat.

“Well, it looks like we don’t really have time to discuss question two anyway, so we’ll get to that at the start of next class.”

Everyone leaves. April and Sterling are packing up together. April is erasing the whiteboard when suddenly she feels heat against her back. She turns around and finds herself nose to nose with Sterling.

“Did you mean all that stuff you said before? About Ruth and Naomi? And God?”

She’s so intense, and so close to April it feels hard to breathe.

“I meant every word of what I said.” She manages to say.

Sterling is looking into her eyes and April is locked into this moment. It feels like the start of something. Or the end. April can never tell with this girl. They stay like that for another minute.

“Sterling…” April murmurs.

“Yeah?”

“You’re really close to me right now.”

“Huh?”

“You’re like, literally really close to me. And I have things to do today so I can’t stand here much longer.”

Sterling jumps back, snapping out of whatever haze she was in.

“Of course you do! I do, too, actually!” She’s chirping now, trying to sound bright and unaffected. Key word: trying.

They finish packing up. As they close the door to the room, April sees the classroom calendar: one week until Halloween.

* * *

**Nomad:** whatre u dressin up as for halloween????

**GoldenGirl04: S** houldn’t it be a secret?

**Nomad:** oh didn’t think about that…

**Nomad:** so whatre the rules with this ematch thing? like do we do the reveal on halloween or the day before or what?

**GoldenGirl04:** I believe it’s done on Halloween. I suppose we should choose a time and a place to meet?

**Nomad:** yeah yeah that sounds perfect

**GoldenGirl04:** The QSU is hosting a Halloween party in Lacey. We could meet on the middle of the dance floor at midnight?

**Nomad:** sounds perfect. how will we know where the middle is tho?

**GoldenGirl04:** There’s a huge chandelier hanging in the center of the room. Can’t miss it.

**Nomad:** ooh classy

**Nomad:** see u then babe [wink emoji]

* * *

The truth is, April’s not sure what she’s dressing up as for Halloween. She casts her mind back to years past, but something tells her that “ghost of RBG” is not an appropriate costume for meeting Nomad. She’s now uncertain that it was _ever_ appropriate, but there’s no time to dwell on that.

She polls her friends. Elena is going as a cat (“I don’t care if it’s overdone, I love cats! And so does Jay”). Darius is planning to be sexy Gumby and April truly doesn’t want to know more. One friend who’s going as Adora from She-Ra suggests that she be Catra or one of the other princesses. Another, attending as Jocelyn Schitt, suggests Moira Rose. Not a bad suggestion, but April doesn’t have the energy to find a wig that would do the costume justice. Also, she wants to be sexy for this and “mom on a sitcom” doesn’t really express that.

The day before Halloween, it hits her: the perfect outfit. She texts Elena for confirmation, receiving a “YES SO CUTE!! Also can you do my cat makeup?” message in response. She drives to the mall to put her outfit together.

Finally, it’s 8pm on Halloween night. April and Elena are getting ready. April’s putting the finishing touches on Elena’s makeup. “Perfect,” she says. “Or should I say purr-fect?”

Elena rolls her eyes. “You’re a riot. But thank you this looks amazing!! Can I do your makeup in return?”

“Sure, sure, just let me get this tie on. I don’t want to mess up my hair and makeup by putting it on.” She pulls the tie over her head and switches places with Elena.

“Mmkay, let’s see. A little mascara…some eyeliner…eyeshadow…let’s give you a smoky eye…and a red lip to finish it off,” she murmurs, narrating the entire process.

April stands and walks to the full-length mirror hanging on the back of their door. She smooths the front of her pants and adjusts her suit jacket. She purses her lips, casting a critical eye on the ensemble. Elena comes up behind her.

“April,” she says seriously. “You look amazing. If you didn’t have that giant-ass tie on you’d look like Cate Blanchett rocking a tailored suit.”

April smiles nervously. “You’re sure this wasn’t a stupid idea?”

“No way! It’s thoughtful and she’ll totally get the Two Weeks Notice reference. Also frankly, you’re way hotter than Hugh Grant.”

That gets a laugh out of her.

“Alright, let’s do this.”

* * *

The party is popping. There must be hundreds of kids dancing their asses off in beautiful Lacey House. Halloween really brings out people’s wild sides. April’s trying to enjoy herself, but she can’t stop thinking about Nomad. What if she doesn’t show? The EMatch app shut off messaging this morning, placing the responsibility of maintaining a connection in the hands of the potential Matchsticks. She and Nomad hadn’t exchanged numbers before that happened, which seems incredibly stupid in hindsight.

No, she tries to reassure herself. It’s going to be fine. They made a plan. It’s cute. It’s romantic. Oh Jesus, there are like a dozen people who could be classified as “under the chandelier”! How’s she supposed to know which one is Nomad?

_It’s close to middddd-night…_

Thriller is starting to play, prompting several yells and a few dedicated individuals start to do the Thriller dance, as if this is an 80s revival. April checks her watch. 11:55.

She takes a lap around the room, picking her way through the crowd, trying to calm her nerves by humming along to Michael Jackson’s spookiest hit. She checks her watch again. 11:58. Okay. She pats her giant tie and starts moving toward the chandelier.

She stands under it and checks her watch again. 11:59. Fuck. Nomad will be here any minute now. Her palms are getting sweaty. Someone taps her back. She spins around and sees…

“Hi, April.”

Lotus?

“Hi…Lotus? Is that…are you? I mean, I was sure you weren’t. Not to be rude but…” She takes in Lotus’ outfit, which seems borderline cultural appropriation. She braces herself. “Are you…nomad?”

“Oh,” Lotus looks down at her outfit, seemingly surprised. “Yeah, I guess technically speaking, yes, I am.”

April cringes without meaning to.

Lotus continues. “I’m supposed to be Honeymaren, specifically. You know, from Frozen 2? My new girlfriend is Elsa, so. We thought it would be cute to match!”

“Oh,” April says again. “Girlfriend? You’re, you have a…I mean?” April trails off, stumped.

“Okay, well, great to see you!” Lotus is clearly drunk and not listening to her. “Just wanted to say hi! Have a lovely Halloween.” And with that, Lotus is gone, presumably off to find her Elsa.

April is beyond confused. She checks her watch again. 12:02. She and Nomad had said midnight on the dot. She sighs. Is this what it’s like to be ghosted? Because it’s not a good feeling.

She’s about to walk away when she feels another tap on her back, along with some heavy breathing. She hesitates and then turns around.

“Sterling,” she breathes out.

“Hi! Oh my God! April! Does this mean? And you’re…dressed like…oh my gosh…I’m soooooo sorry God this night has been…and traffic was just…” Sterling’s breathing hard, panting, unable to get out a full sentence.

“ _You’re_ Nomad?” April practically screeches. She’s in shock. Everything fades out. The music, the noise of people talking and singing, even Sterling’s heavy breathing. It fades and she’s completely focused on Sterling. Things are falling into place. From the look on Sterling’s face, it seems like something similar is happening in her head.

“ _You’re_ GoldenGirl04,” Sterling murmurs, and there’s something like awe in the way she says it.

“Yes,” April manages to respond.

“And you’re Hugh Grant in Two Weeks Notice,” Sterling’s voice cracks a little and it looks like she might cry.

“I—yeah. Who are you?” April asks, looking down at Sterling’s outfit for the first time. She’s wearing a floor-length, silky, midnight blue gown. It’s sleeveless, with a sweetheart neckline.

Sterling laughs wetly and pulls something from her handbag. It’s a red clown nose. She puts it on slowly, adjusting it self-consciously. “Sandy Bullock,” she says.

April’s completely mesmerized now. Her hands move on their own. She reaches out and takes the clown nose off of Sterling’s face. “I’m really glad it’s you,” she whispers.

Sterling nods. April puts a hand on the back of Sterling’s neck and pulls her into a kiss. They stand kissing under the chandelier for what feels like hours, arms wrapped tightly around each other, swaying completely arrhythmically to the music. It feels like the start of something new.

_And they lived happily ever after…_


End file.
